Week 3 with Beetle

15 Jul

I sometimes can’t believe it’s been only three weeks since we actually met the little Beetle.She truly completes our little family and is exactly made to fit like the last puzzle piece we were looking for.  She seems to know us now as she stares at us out of her big beady black eyes , that gave her her nickname. 

My happiest moments this week have been when she lies on my chest ,completely calm and happy after a feed. I love holding her there and just taking in the moment. With Bandar , unfortunately I was so caught up in the day to day stress , that I  really don’t think I savored these fleeting moments so much.Maybe this time around these seem sweeter as I know they are so fleeting  and this is in all likelihood my last little baby. 

We learnt this week that Beetle is a slow weight gainer and this is a little worrisome . So we have had doctor and lactation consultant visits and though I am all for supplementing her feeds with some formula soon to see the weight gain start, my vullage of medical professionals want to wait.and i gave to trust them and our little girl to gain with time. So that’s what we are doing and also upping our feeds to every 2- 2.5 hours as we wait and monitor. This week I strongly considered buying an infant weighing scale but good sense prevailed and I decided to not drive myself mad with weigh ins post every feed. Instead we will make do with the weekly visits.

On a few nights this last week, I managed Beetle’s mid night awakenings completely on my own to allow the very sleep deprived working husband to get his sleep and actually be functional the next day. This involved diaper changes, feeding ,burping, lifting Beetle from bassinet to lap and vice versa and reswaddling. I feel this is an achievement of sorts for me as the husbadoo was doing  most  of this, except the feeding itself,  till last week. I really hope nights get easier before I return to work in October.i cannot imagine a full working day with this kind of disturbed sleep.

I started some pumping this week between feeds and there is not more exhausting and frustrating than spending the time  and energy to get  a measly amount . And there is the fun of washing and sterilizing all the parts after pumping .  I tend to get lazy with pumping in addition to the actual feeding itself . I would love to do nothing  but simply hold my baby close after feeds or mindlessly browse the web when I have some downtime . But I really need to pull up my socks and get in a few pumps a day . I know this freezer stash will help me immensely once I go back to work and have busy days.

This week was also a reminder to really come to terms with what we can and can’t do anymore with an infant and a preschooler.  Even simple things like hosting good friends for a short evening visit involved cleaning the house, having basic groceries and having adults and children presentable and it seemed impossible this weekend. So we simple took the liberty of cancelling with the friends and I felt myself completely destress and just enjoyed my quiet evening with Bettle  ,while the husband took Bandar on a grocery run . I also have considered making our cleaner and cook come more frequently over the next year and am strongly considering Amazon Fresh or another delivery service for groceries . Life with two kids and fulltime jobs is going to be harder than I ever thought it would be this next year.

Bandar is definitely getting better with the changes around her. We reinstated a goodness chart and decided that sleep was the biggest fix we had to incorporate to have a good tempered big sister . There is a lot of work to still be done on her bedtime and wake time, but I think with small changes each week, we will get there by the time public school starts in mid August.

My mom leaves in a few days and I am truly going to miss her. She has selflessly left behind my dad , her career and life in India, and has done so much for me and my family these last two months. She doesn’t expect any gratitude or appreciation and I really am at a loss on how I would ever repay her kindness if I even tried. I guess you simply don’t keep score with family.

I definitely do not do well with confinement of any sort. I went downstairs a few times this week for a cup of tea and a meal or two and that itself did wonders for my mood.  I also drove Bandar to school today which made both her and I very happy. I am not at a 100 percent or even at an 80 yet but will get there over the next few weeks. I hope to be more mobile in this time and even baby wear soon. Most carriers and slings advise waiting till the baby is 8 lbs and our little peanut is not yet there. To keep my sanity I have been watching a few light sit come and shows , the kind that I absolutely do not need to think about – the Bachelorette, last few episodes of the Mindy project , Fresh of the boat , Blackish.  I think I need a few more weeks before I actually catch up on Scandal,OITNB and other heavier stuff. 

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One Response to “Week 3 with Beetle”

  1. Dil On The Rocks July 19, 2017 at 1:17 pm #

    Keeping your sanity and taking some me time off are very important. That’s what kept me going through my years. 😊

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