Adult decisions are not fun

18 Mar

So I have to be the most confused person in the entire world. After complaining to all and sundry, whining, cribbing and then slowing coming to terms with working remote , I just turned down a potential local opportunity because of the commute. What is wrong with me? It was just an interview call for a really good Fortune 50 company that fit my profile beautifully but I obviously may not have even landed the job if I interviewed. They were skeptical about the commute themselves – I would be the only person in the world traveling from NYC to NJ instead of the other way around . So they had given me a few days to consider if I wanted to even interview and sent me train and bus schedules. I thought about it long and hard and discussed it with the husbadoo the last two days. Finally I replied to them today saying I would not be able to handle the commute taking our current circumstances into account. I still don’t know if I did the right thing here. It would definitely have paid me more than what I currently make that would have more than covered my travel costs. But somehow I was not up for traveling 1 hour plus each day one way.
It is time away from precious Bandar. Plus I started thinking about paid time off from work- I am a few months away from 4 weeks of vacation time and 2 weeks of personal time!This translates into many small breaks through the year or one big India trip.
We have a 2 year lease here, we are a stone’s throw away from the university for the husbadoo and Bandar is just now adjusting to daycare. I cannot imagine us moving just for this opportunity immediately to NJ.
Two particular instances that really helped me decide were these-
1) Bandar goes to a lovely daycare that is really so homely and not as structured and rigorous as the others I have seen. At 4 pm ,one of the kids demanded pancakes and they decided to make them. Their teacher lives right above the school and she brought all the ingredients to class and the kids had fun mixing everything up.
When I went at 4:30 pm to pick up Bandar, I sat down with her to feed her the pancake she had helped make. I loved every minute of seeing her eat it up and then she showed me all the things she did at school that day – the pictures she painted, the playdough she moulded. If I had taken a job that took me so far out each day,I would miss out on picking/ dropping her and I love every minute of it.
2) Bandar only attends half days on Fridays as it is relatively very light for me and this Friday like others I got to pick her up early, change her, read to her and lie down with her till she fell asleep. I want to enjoy a few more weeks of this before I am ready to give up our Fridays altogether.

So I hope this decision is not something I regret. My year end review is next week and I am so worried that it will make me regret the decision I have taken here.
Hopefully this is a sign of better opportunities to come.

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2 Responses to “Adult decisions are not fun”

  1. Titaxy March 20, 2014 at 12:00 am #

    that definitely sounds like a bad dilemma to be in. i hope something better that suits your needs perfectly comes along soon. commuting 1hr one way would’ve been a nightmare.

    • popgoesthebiscuit March 20, 2014 at 12:01 am #

      Hope so too. Feel I took the right decision here and put my personal life first.

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